Ever wondered why cats does not trust humans that easily? It's because there are some humans that are cruel.. evil and many more. It's the same. Why some humans are cautions of the same kind? It's because there are people who uses one another. That is how the word 'used' and 'betrayal' is formed. Have been seeking for people i can trust but it seems like whenever I trust someone, I will end up being betrayed and thrown away. That is what happened to me two months ago. I have been classmates with this girl for 2 years in my high school and we coincidentally became classmates again in college. I was there to first day of school and I was being myself. Loud and hyper like how I am when I was younger so I can get people to like me and treasure me again but I was wrong. People started hating me because I was annoying and irritating. From that day onwards, I told myself that I will only mix with the people I feel comfortable with and I did. A few days later, she came into my class as a new student. In high school, she was one of the most popular girls in the school so I wouldn't be shocked if she feels all high and mighty on the first day. When I greeted her in the morning, she was like "Hey Ryn! I didn't know that you are in this school! How have you been doing?" And so I answered her questions with a simple "Been great." The first day of her college life, she has been with me for the whole entire day. When it was introduction time, She acted all shy and nervous. I wasn't sure if she was really shy or not so I decided to help her with her introduction but was told off by teacher. "Are you her?" Was what my teacher said to me. I introduced her to my clique members and she looked happy. But after the introduction to my clique members, she kind of mingle with the others and not me. I feel pretty left out to be honest. The next day, she got everyone's attention in my clique when I was in the toilet and do you know what she said? I am a silent people in high school and she knows that. I was hated by everyone in my class just because I was hyper and loud and I do not think twice before doing anything. And that was what she told everyone in my clique. Fearing that everyone will leave me again and sad that my high school life is being brought to my college life, I cried in school and infront of everyone. Guess what, she was there too and she was one of the person that asked me if I was alright. "Do I look like I am alright to you? Do I look like I will be alright when everyone here knows that I am anti-social?" Was what I wanted to say to her but I have a weakness to girls. Girls are fragile.. I just hope that my current clique members would not leave me in the future.. I don't want anyone to leave me again.. I don't like being alone..
"With a handful of allies, this cat is able to walk forward and continue living her life to the fullest. This cat just wish that her allies will never walk away from her cries and leave her when she need them the most. Hoping that the day where they will all leave her will never come and wish that everyone else will not judge her because of who she is."
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